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I know that my life is going thru some drastic changes and don’t get me wrong I am very excited. I have the support of my mom and husband and my extended family but somehow I still feel all alone in this. I know that at times I am very hard to handle because of all the moods. There are certain things that just irritated me like rude people or people coming at me saying ” you should do this or do that” acting as if I don’t know what I’m doing. Yes, I am going to be a first time mom but I am capable using common sense on things. I have been around babies my whole life. I am one of the oldest out of 56 cousins, I’m pretty sure at this point, I know what I’m doing. I feel that because of all those things I am always very irritated. I dont mean to come off as rude but instead of saying what I really feel, I just keep quiet but I can’t hide it very well, it usually comes out in my face gestures or tone of voice. All I want is to be understood, that I am tired, my back hurts but I also want to be included in things or events or even just asked to go out and do something that’s for me and the baby. I want to feel like everyone is excited for her and for me. I don’t want to be the certain of attention I have never been one for that but now I just want some feeling of being included or cared for. *sigh* I write this here in hopes that those I care about may see it and for second think about me. that’s all

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